I guess I always knew something was different about me. Just by going through life, comparing myself to the other ponies, I noticed odd things. Most ponies didn't care when they had to pay with an odd number of bits. Or when there wasn't an even number of stairs. These things bothered me, frustrated me even, but they weren't the real problem.
It was everything. All these little things that annoyed me to no end, but didn't bother anypony else, all thrown together in a terrible ball, combined with the very fact that it made me different. It was a horrendous existence.
You, one of my closest friends, recall when I submitted plans to increase the size of my illustrious establishment. So many high profile clients, so many friends to please, I simply had to acquire a larger work space. Not to mention the need for a bigger storage area. It was my plan to build for myself the greatest, most fabulous boutique in all of Equestria!
Pure coincidence I assure you, but it was then that I decided I would do something about my psychological problem. I avowed to myself that I wouldn't fuss over these things anymore. If something silly happened, I would ignore it and wait for the offending event to pass, and my frustration with it. After all, on at least one occasion previous, I recall tearing myself away from my vexations with little negative consequence.
And so my trials began. From the very beginning, things were looking down. When I received the construction permits for my project, I noticed they were misnumbered. Undoubtedly this was a mild oversight on the government's part, and wouldn't cause any real problems for me. Nevertheless I had to fight off the urge to point it out, and demand refiling under the appropriate numbers. With my terrible permits in hoof, I bid the mayor good day and left.
I proceeded to the boutique, set the offensive permits down, and gathered up the orders for the needed materials, which I had filled out in advance. I was going to do this work myself. Granted, it was a significant step up in difficulty from the original boutique, but I had built that with my own hooves, and it had come out wonderfully. It was simply a fact that nopony else could be expected to construct a building to my satisfaction. With all the orders in hoof, I quickly walked to the post office and dropped them off, thoughts of the number mishap with the permits mostly forgotten.
For the next week I finalised my plans, while continuing the last bits of sewing and design work I had scheduled before the boutique would close for expansion. And every day I was met with a new challenge to overcome. If my table was jostled and no longer in the proper spot, I didn't move it back. I tried to stop counting stitches on my dresses. Nopony ever noticed they were always multiples of three, and sometimes making them so was to the detriment of the design. I stopped eating my food in the "proper" order, and I didn't make a big fuss when Opalescence knocked something over or otherwise got into mischief.
I felt terrible. I was frustrated all the time, and I could feel the stress mounting. But I assured myself it would pass. These things, I knew they didn't matter, and I hoped I'd eventually feel like they didn't matter too. Luckily my friends weren't spending too much time with me. They knew I was busy. The only thing that happened of note was going to the spa with Fluttershy, as we did every week. It made me feel a little better, because nothing went wrong, but all the stress and anxiety and frustration returned as soon as I got back to the boutique.
Everything was wrong. The tables were askew, the mannequins weren't in a symmetrical pattern, the fabrics weren't organised by frequency or texture, and the cat hair was building up. It was summer, Opalescence was shedding more than usual, and I wasn't fussing about it. It burned me up inside, seeing it everywhere.
When she came trotting up as if nothing was wrong, I got even more angry. She was the cause of at least some of my problems, and there she was acting like nothing was wrong. I proceeded to pick her up by the scruff and throw her outside, something I'd never done before. I love Opalescence, but at that particular time I didn't. I just wanted her gone.
I proceeded with the very last parts of my work for the week, trying to ignore Opal's distressed meowing from outside. She'd been outside before, but at the moment she clearly didn't want to be there. But that didn't matter. For once, what I wanted seemed more important.
The next week began, and the boutique was officially closed, and breakables and other unneeded things were packed and moved out temporarily.
My orders were staggered, and so long as everything went on schedule, construction would be orderly and completed in a little over a month. First thing was the foundation. Cement and concrete are dangerous and I had to be careful. But it was nothing I hadn't done before, and everything went smoothly.
The following week I got a visit from my parents, along with my sister Sweetie Belle. I knew immediately I was in trouble. I hardly ever saw my parents unless it was to take care of Sweetie. And this time was no exception.
They were going on a trip to Manehatten, and didn't want to bring Sweetie. I was extremely annoyed. They knew for months that I was going to be busy, and yet they decided to go off on some trip and thrust the added responsibility of caring for Sweetie upon me. Nevertheless, I forced a smile, and nodded, accepting the job of being Sweetie's babysitter for the next two weeks. I hoped she wouldn't be too much trouble. I made a mental note that no matter what, her friends were not visiting during this time. If she wanted to play with them, she'd go away and do it.
Unfortunately she didn't seem interested in leaving to stay with friends. She knew I was busy, and as always, she wanted to help. Also as always, she did nothing but cause trouble.
The entire first week was a nightmare. She messed up my stacks of wood, my piles of bricks, and would constantly endanger herself near the cement, not knowing how caustic it was. And every time she'd frown and open up those big eyes of hers and say how sorry she was.
I tried to get her to stop. I told her to do something else. She would, for a while, but she'd always come back and ruin whatever I was doing. I told her to go outside and play with her friends. She did, maybe for an hour, but again she'd return to mess everything up. And every time I just accepted it. I didn't blow up at her. I didn't yell, or whine. I just smiled and tried to calmly wait for everything that bothered me to just go away. It never did.
I did my best to accept them, but the thousands of problems Sweetie Belle was causing drove me to finally consider a solution. I no longer know how I thought this was a good idea, but at the time my cracking psyche drove me to think it was the greatest idea in the world. And I bore it out without tipping my hat at all.
"Sweetie, I've been thinking," I said that fateful morning. I put on my most pleasant voice, careful to not let it crack under the forced sweetness. We were eating breakfast, and I was deliberately switching between items in an attempt to get used to less order, but only causing myself more frustration.
Sweetie's eyes got big with excitement at my words. She knew by my tone of voice I was about to tell her something she would like.
"What?" she asked, eyes wide as saucers.
"I know how much you want to help me with the construction, and today is a very special day. Do you know what I'm doing today?"
Sweetie shook her head.
"Today, I'll be bricklaying. It's a lot of work, but if you'd like, I suppose you could help me with it."
Sweetie grinned. "Really? I can?"
I smiled and nodded. "So long as you promise to do as I say. You also have to be careful. I wouldn't want you to get hurt. Do you think you can follow my instructions?"
"Yes, anything you say!" she said, and she dove into her breakfast with renewed vigour.
We finished our breakfast and proceeded to what was going to be a large underground storage area. I had needed a bigger basement for a while, and so had made sure to include one in the expansion. I had already moved the bricks and the cement there, and so I was ready to begin.
"I'm going to mix the cement Sweetie, please stand back."
For once, she did as she was told. I worked slowly, carefully. Putting everything into the mixer, I then turned to Sweetie.
"Be a dear and bring that sack of bricks over here," I said, indicating with my hoof what I was talking about. Sweetie looked at me incredulously.
"I don't think I can carry that," she said.
"I'm sure you can," I said. She shrugged, and turned. I slowly moved behind the mixer, and picked up a brick I had placed there for this moment. Sweetie grabbed the end of the sack, and pulled. She was right of course, she wasn't strong enough to carry it. But she kept trying, pulling with all her might in an attempt to move the bricks to where I said I wanted them. And slowly, I crept up on her, avoiding making a single clop as my hooves hit the ground.
All thoughts of what I was doing exited my head. I didn't think about my parents, that eventually they'd come back and wonder what happened to Sweetie. I didn't think about the law, that murder was a very serious offense, almost unheard of in Equestria. I didn't even think about how this was my sister. In fact, at that moment, she wasn't my sister. She was the source of my pain, the cause of endless troubles. So terrible was my pain, I had to get rid of it, by any means necessary. Even more, I had to make it know there was a problem. If I didn't, I was sure I would go mad.
I struck the back of her head as hard as I could. With a loud thunk, she collapsed on the bricks. It was so quick she hadn't even cried out in surprise. She wasn't dead though. I knew that. She was just unconscious. I dragged her towards the end of the room, where the brick wall was going to be. I measure out with my hooves several paces from where the plans said the wall needed to be placed, so there was some extra space between the back side of the future brick wall and the dirt. I knew I couldn't have Sweetie wake up in the middle of my construction and escape, so the first thing I did was dig a small hole, and place Sweetie's hooves in it. I then filled it with cement. By the time she woke up, it would be set.
I moved to add ingredients to the cement, to make a good mortar. When that was done, I started to lay the bricks. Brick by brick my problems were ending. I finished everywhere but where Sweetie was, intentionally saving that part for last. Finally, when I could wait no longer, I began to lay bricks there too.
She had woken up. She blinked, her eyes bleary.
"What?" She asked, her voice low. "Where am I?"
"You're helping me with my construction," I said. I smiled warmly at her.
She looked around, and then down at her hooves. She pulled at them, trying to get them out of the cement, but they wouldn't budge.
"I'm stuck! Help me!" she screamed. I just smiled and nodded.
"Everything's fine," I said. "You'll be fine here."
"It burns," she cried, pulling at her hooves again.
"I know."
"Rarity, what are you doing? What did I do?!" she was becoming hysterical, but I knew nopony would hear her. We were underground, and she was behind a wall. I continued my brick laying. "I promise I won't bother you anymore! I'm sorry, I didn't mean it. Whatever I did, I'm sorry! Please Rarity, please help me!"
I was on the final tier, and Sweetie was completely frantic, crying and jostling wildly. I worried she might actually topple herself over somehow, and ruin my beautiful wall. Even now she was trying to cause problems.
I could just barely make out her next cry. "I love you Rarity! I'm so sorry!"
"I love you too," I said, and put the final brick in its place. I waited to see if I could hear anything else. It was quiet.
"Sweetie Belle?" I shouted. A pause. Still nothing. I suddenly felt sick to my stomach. It must have been the hard work catching up with me. It was time for a break. Soon, the bricks would be set and I could lay down the plaster. Everything would be fine.
It started when Rarity came to the library to tell me her sister was missing. At first I was sceptical. I saw Sweetie Belle out with her friends the day before yesterday. But Rarity was frantic, and assured me that Sweetie hadn't come home last night. At that, I asked if she told anypony else. Rarity said that no, she hadn't spoken to anypony because she didn't want the entire town to worry, that probably Sweetie had just wandered off and gotten lost and they just needed to find her. I suggested we ask our other friends for help, but she refused. Now this I found odd, but when Rarity said all that was needed was my "fabulous intelligence," I caved and promised to keep it a secret, at least for a while. But if we still hadn't found her by nightfall, we would have to tell others. Rarity agreed.
After I left Spike a note telling him I'd be out, but not specifying why, Rarity and myself began our search by splitting up. Rarity said she'd search Sweet Apple Aces, and I was left to search around Ponyville. I asked around, but nopony had seen Sweetie since the last time I had seen her. After her last sighting was firmly established, I decided I should look for those close to Sweetie Bell. Sweetie Belle's friend, Apple Bloom was probably at her home of Sweet Apple Acres, and thus I decided was probably being spoken to by Rarity now. If she wasn't at Sweet Apple Acres, she would be with Scootaloo, another one of Sweetie's friends. And so unless something very odd was going on, Scootaloo was the more productive search.
Indeed, it wasn't long before I found both Scootaloo and Apple Bloom together just outside Ponyville, around Fluttershy's cottage near the Everfree forest. I worried they were being foolhardy, playing so close to said forest, thought truth be told it wasn't very dangerous as it was still close to town.
I smiled as I approached them, though I admit I've never been very good at keeping secrets, so it could be that I made more of a grimace. When the two little fillies saw me, they stopped their playing and smiled brightly, greeting me enthusiastically.
"My little ponies," I said, once within ear shot. "Have either of you seen Sweetie Belle today?"
Scootaloo scowled, and Apple Bloom shook her head. A strange thought occurred to me then, but it was much too early to entertain such things.
"She's been spending a lot of time with Rarity," said Apple Bloom. "'No time for fun and games when you have to help build a boutique!'" Her voice was in a mocking tone, and probably, she was quoting something Sweetie had said.
"When was the last time you saw her?"
"The day before yesterday," said Scootaloo. She rolled her eyes. "We only got to play for two hours before she said she had to leave to help Rarity some more."
"I...see," I said, trying to keep the worry from my voice. "Alright, thanks for your help girls."
"Wait," called Apple Bloom. "Is Sweetie in trouble? Did she do something bad?"
"Whatever it was we didn't have anything to do with it!" shouted Scootaloo.
I paused for a moment. Was Sweetie Belle in trouble? It was starting to look like she was.
I tried to assure the fillies that Sweetie hadn't done anything wrong, and everything was fine, though I added a "probably" under my breath. I had walked into a dead end, and was at a loss for where to go from here. So I began my walk all the way across town, to Sweet Apple Acres in hopes of catching up with Rarity.
About half way there was Carousel Boutique, still under construction. Thinking it wouldn't take too long, I decided to check and make sure that Rarity wasn't already back home, though I doubted it. I knocked, and when there was no answer, I let myself in.
The place was a mess. Rarity had always been, for lack of a better word, anal about neatness. It was astonishing to see the place in such disarray. As this was so uncharacteristic of my friend, and I, I am ashamed to say, am rather nosy, I decided to take a closer look around.
I sighted several rather mundane things, which despite their messy state, weren't particularly out of place. There was a table, askew, with papers littering the top. I noticed most of these were blueprints for the expansion project. There were food stains on some of them, mainly around the ends of the table, indicating to me that Rarity and Sweetie Belle had eaten breakfast here. I moved on.
I continued my search. The shower was dirty, but not exceptionally so. Hard water stains had just begun to form, and some of the bottles of soap and hair care products were left open. The entire place was starting to look like Pinkie Pie's more than Rarity's.
I entered the new basement. It looked to be only recently begun, and my suspicions were confirmed when I noticed that the blueprints for this particular room were here, as well as bags of cement, a mixer, and sacks of bricks. I saw only one completed wall. In fact, it was not only built, but plastered, which I found very unusual. One usually waits until all walls are build before applying the plaster, and Rarity wasn't one to do things out of order. She also wasn't ignorant of construction, and I had recently learned she designed and built her original boutique from the ground up.
I stood there, silently, taking everything in. It was silent. I chill crept up my spine, and I suddenly felt ill at ease. I decided to leave the basement.
Going back upstairs, I felt overcome with fatigue, probably from the dark, damp environment of the basement. I took a seat at the table covered in blueprints, along with a few calming breaths.
I looked down again at the papers. I noticed the order of them, that things that would be constructed first were on the bottom, and more recent additions were on top. Looking again at the food stains, I then saw what exactly they were on. It was for the most recent addition, just prior to the basement. Rarity was punctual, however if the boutique was any indication, she was a currently out of sorts. Still, I thought about what it meant.
There were two areas where food had spilled, so two ponies must have eaten here. They were not fresh stains, so it couldn't have been done this morning, but neither did they appear very old, and the blueprints themselves indicated it happened very recently.
Further, it looked like Rarity herself was either the last one to see Sweetie, or she hadn't told me everything she knew about Sweetie's disappearance. Possibly both were true, and the ramifications were becoming more clear to me.
I stood up. I suddenly wanted very badly to leave. I did so, and made my way back to the library. Opening the door, It looked like Spike still hadn't returned yet. And so I decided to quickly write these events down here in my journal while they were still fresh in my mind.
I'm starting to think Rarity either knows more about what's happened to Sweetie than she is letting on, or she's the one who caused the disappearance. Perhaps an accident she doesn't want to be blamed for, or maybe Sweetie has run away recently and Rarity's hoping to find her before anypony can blame her for bad babysitting. I'm not sure. But whatever it is, it doesn't seem good, and I intend to add to the note to Spike to check my journal when he gets back, and leave this here before I confront Rarity about this. Just in case.
I was out getting supplies for Twilight and me, and I took so long because I was chatting with Pinkie Pie at Sugarcube Corner. When I got back to the library which Twilight and I live in, I found the note she left for me, and I read her journal. Well not all of it, just what she told me to read. I'm not sure what's going on, but whatever it is, it doesn't seem good, and Twilight's the boss so I got to do what she says. She told me to keep a log of what I see and hear, "just in case" so I started doing that too.
I went straight to Carousel Boutique, since I thought that's where Twilight would have gone to, even though she just came from there. When I arrived, it turned out I was right. Rarity had just returned as well, and I hadn't missed anything. At that moment, I was sure I was a very lucky dragon, getting a front row seat to Twilight discovering the truth behind some big mystery. Twilight is the smartest pony in Ponyville, and she'd definitely figure things out. I couldn't believe Rarity was actually doing something wrong. There's probably something else going on here.
"It's good to see you Spike," said Twilight. Rarity just smiled. It didn't look like a happy smile though.
"I just asked Twilight here what she found out," said Rarity. She didn't look at me, as usual, but instead just stared straight at Twilight.
There was a pause, and I could practically see the gears in Twilight's mind turning. When she didn't speak up for several moments, I spoke up for her.
"What are you thinking, Twilight?" I asked, hesitant. I was beginning to wonder if maybe Twilight should leave things alone.
There was another pause.
"Rarity, why are things such a mess?"
Rarity frowned.
"I'd rather not say."
"Things being so messy...these things usually bother you. I think they still do."
I could see Rarity's frown deepen. Her eye twitched slightly, and she rubbed the back of her front right leg nervously.
Twilight took a deep breath before she spoke again.
"I know you've always had a problem with keeping things orderly. All your friends know that. And I know nopony but Fluttershy has seen you since you started construction on your boutique. When she did see you, she said you seemed a bit frazzled. I think you've been trying to work through your problem."
"What problem?" I asked.
"This isn't confirmed I don't think, and I'm not a doctor, but I think Rarity has something called Obsessive-Compulsive Personality Disorder. It would explain a lot of her behaviour."
"Even if that's true, there's nothing wrong with trying to fix one's psychological problems, Twilight," I said.
"There is if you can't do it on your own. And clearly, Rarity can't. That's why everything is such a mess. She's been trying to fix her problems all on her own, without any guidance. Instead of being preoccupied with order, she's letting everything get as disorderly as it wants, and it's eating her up inside! Isn't that right, Rarity?"
Rarity nodded, her head movement jerky. She was glaring, and I started to worry for our safety. It was starting to sound like Twilight was saying Rarity was crazy.
I took a few calming breaths. "But...what does any of this have to do with Sweetie Belle? Isn't that the problem you're supposed to be solving?"
There was the briefest of pauses, as Twilight gathered her thoughts. She was so fast, anyone who didn't know her as long as me would assume she didn't need any time to think at all, but just knew it all already.
"Rarity had to take care of Sweetie Belle without any prior warning. Because she'd been trying to allow things to happen without her interference, she went ahead and accepted the responsibility of caring for Sweetie while her parents were away. But Sweetie's quite a handful, she's always getting into things she shouldn't and causing a mess. I bet it was hard for you, Rarity."
Rarity remained silent.
"And I guess eventually, you couldn't take it anymore. But what did you do?"
I gasped. "Are you saying Rarity is the reason Sweetie Belle is missing? That she did something to her own sister? That's crazy, Twilight! I don't believe it!"
"Suppose that I'm right on at least one point, that Rarity has this problem, and she's been trying to work through it herself. We also have to take into account that nopony has seen Sweetie since the day before yesterday, except for Rarity. If you read my journal Spike, you should also know about the evidence on that table, the breakfast stains, and the most recent construction.
"Rarity's obviously not mentally healthy. She should have gone to see a doctor as soon as things weren't getting any better, but she didn't. She just isn't thinking clearly anymore. It's not -" Twilight stopped speaking. Her eyes widened.
"You...you...oh Rarity."
"What? What is it?!" I asked.
"You killed her," said Twilight. It was almost a whisper. I was low enough that I could hope I misheard. There was no way, it couldn't be true.
"That's why that basement wall is the most recent addition. That's why it's already plastered up. You couldn't have anypony find her, so you hid her body in the wall!"
"No," I said. I wanted to throw up. The room felt like it was spinning. I let my legs fall from under me, and buried my face into my hands. It couldn't be true. I didn't want it to be true.
"And," continued Twilight, still speaking in a low voice. "To help remove suspicion from you, you went to me. Why would the killer be the one to ask for help in solving their own crime? Well, it didn't work. I'm afraid I'm going to have to go to the authorities and tell them. I hope I'm wrong, and when we remove that wall, there's nothing there. But I don't think I am."
"Yes," said Rarity. "I did it."
I felt tears falling down my face. The love of my life had done something...like this. How could this have happened?
"But," continued Rarity. "You've missed a few things."
"Oh?" said Twilight. I could tell from her voice that even through all this, she was interested to learn more.
"I suppose you couldn't be expected to know. I did not bury Sweetie behind a wall to hide a dead body, I buried her behind the wall as a method of removal. She was alive when she was put there, and so was placed out of my way."
Twilight's legs were trembling in anger as she spoke.
"She's still dead."
"But Twilight!" I shouted, getting a bit hopeful. "If she was alive when she was put there, maybe she's still alive?! Maybe we can still -" Twilight shook her head.
"Knowing Rarity, that wall was built air-tight. Sweetie would have suffocated by now."
It was like I was hearing the news for the first time again. I liked Sweetie. She and her friends were fun to hang out with sometimes. At that point another thought crossed my mind. How would Apple Bloom and Scootaloo react to this? I didn't want to think about it.
"There's more," said Rarity.
"More?" asked Twilight. "How could there be more?"
"I didn't set you on the case just to help remove suspicion. I also told you to make sure I wouldn't get caught."
"What are you talking about?" asked Twilight. "You have been caught!"
"Because I was trying to get over my problem by not cleaning up and making things neat and orderly, I couldn't very well spend too much time cleaning up the crime scene. That just wouldn't do. But at the same time, I knew if I left it as it was, I would be found out. So I did a little tidying up, but not too much. And to see if I did a good job, I told you Sweetie was missing and for you to find her. You're the most clever pony in town, excessively clever if I may say so, and I knew if you couldn't figure out what happened, nopony could. And if you did, I'd find out what needed to be patched up so I wouldn't be caught by anyone else. In this way, I wouldn't get caught with the least amount of personal interference with the crime scene. So I followed you around all day, as you asked questions and snooped around my boutique. You showed up here again with all the pieces you needed, and just put them all together now. And what luck, you explained the process to me here! You even wrote it down! After this is over, I'll have to go and get that journal of yours."
"You won't get the - "
It happened faster than I could ever expect. If I had blinked at the wrong time, I would have missed it. Rarity had lunged forward, and stabbed Twilight in the neck using her horn. Twilight lunged back, but it was too late, she was already hit. She collapsed. I screamed.
"Twilight!" I shouted. I ran over to her, putting my hands on her wound, trying to stop the bleeding. "How could you?!" I shouted, looking at Rarity. She was smiling.
"She served her purpose," said Rarity. "It doesn't matter what you do Spike, she will die. I know anatomy pretty well you see, the only way she'd survive was if you yourself knew any good healing spells. But even if you did, you're not a unicorn and so can't cast them."
"If I got her to the emergency care centre," I said, trying to pick Twilight up. She was too heavy, I could barely move her.
"It would take too long. She would die on the way."
I collapsed, Twilight's weight being too much for me. I couldn't stop crying, and I could hardly see anything through the tears. It felt like I was choking. I wanted to die.
"Are you going to kill me too?" I asked. I tried to keep the hope out of my voice. At that moment, all I wanted was to stay with Twilight. She was more than my boss, she was my best friend, as close to me as family. I loved her, and I was willing to do anything to stay with her.
"Not yet. You're not done," she said. She took a step forward, and I reflexively moved back, pushing myself against Twilight, who was now making a terrible gurgling sund, probably trying to speak.
"What do you need me for?" I asked.
Rarity smiled. "To tell the rest of the story, of course!" I didn't understand. She must have noticed, because she continued to speak without me asking what she meant. "After Twilight left the library, I went in and saw that note she left you. She told you to keep a record. Well, I want you to keep a record too. You should write down what happened, and then, I'll kill you."
Twilight's gurgling had finally stopped. I looked over at her. Her eyes were still, and lifeless. I buried my face into her fur, hoping this was all just a bad dream. I don't know how much time passed, but when I realised I wasn't going to wake up from a horrible nightmare, I just nodded. I would do what Rarity said, and I would see Twilight again. There wasn't any fighting it. I'm just a baby dragon, and Rarity has already killed two ponies. I couldn't hope to overpower her, and with my stubby little legs, I couldn't outrun her either.
So I did as I was told. And wrote down what happened here. I don't know why Rarity wants to have this all written down, and I don't really care. I just hope Twilight will forgive me.
My original purpose in acquiring a log of what happened was just to be very thorough. I wanted to make sure I wouldn't miss anything. If I was caught, I wouldn't be able to continue making fabulous dresses! So I spent a lot of energy going over what was written by Twilight and Spike, making sure that when the time came, nopony would figure out what happened.
I also had to keep everything in mind as I hid two more bodies. It wasn't an unexpected choice, Spike and Twilight were put in the walls of my basement as well. A few days later and the basement was finished, and still nopony had come to ask where Twilight, Spike, or Sweetie was. I knew it was only a matter of time. Of course, everything was settled, so when it did happen, I wouldn't be caught.
And I wasn't. The very next day after the basement was completed, Applejack came by, asking if I had seen Twilight or Spike recently. Apparently you had all noticed she was missing, and so were getting together to go find her. I put on my best pained look, and told Applejack about Sweetie going missing, and asking Twilight and Spike for help. Many lies later, and Applejack was under the impression that Twilight and Spike had simply gone missing as well.
I helped my friends search in vain. Celestia found out her student was missing, and sent guards, and eventually, visited herself, in hopes of finding her student. She never did of course.
While this was happening, what Twilight said about my failure to fix my own problems were echoing through my mind. She was correct. I wasn't getting anywhere. So I reverted back to my old self. I started caring again. I wasn't well, and it had to be done or who knows what else I might end up doing? In the end, nopony was left who noticed any change in me. And even though I wasn't stressed anymore, and the severity of what I had done had time to sink in...I still didn't care. I still don't. I feel that I did what was required at the time.
Which is why I have written down the events prior to Twilight's journal entry, to the best of my recollection. It's been decades, it's possible my memory is fuzzy, but here they are. I am old, Rainbow Dash, and I know I'm going to die soon. Everything Twilight, Spike, and myself have written will be sent to you after my death because, of my two friends who are still alive, and likely be after I am gone, I feel you are the one most qualified to pass judgment on me.
You are the element of Loyalty. Applejack would just tell everyone what happened by default, because it was the truth. Plus, she and I always had a tense relationship. You however, have a more nuanced opinion, being Loyal to all of us, to me, and my victims.
So what will it be, Rainbow Dash? Should the truth be known? Will my name be remembered as one of the most horrible villains in Equestria? Or will you take this secret to the grave with you? It's too bad I won't be there to find out.